Experience sharing by Adlilatun Nur

For Mothers By Mothers : Thank You Kak Adli for willing to share her experience. At first I was very afraid to asked her about her condition and all. But Kak Adli, being profesional and positive, willing to share with us her experience. 'Sebagai Panduan' kata Kak Adli. Thank You soo much.

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After almost 4years hidup as 'sepasang', finally i'm pregnant... Alhamdulliah... Bersyukur sangat2 atas kurnian Allah...

But at early stage of pregnancy... I bleed while bercuti with husband d Cherating. Maybe because d day before, kami bz menjelajah shopping malls d kuantan n balik pun dh mlm... My body too tired maybe?

On d day, masuk toilet mo p mandi, tiba2... Darah flow nob stop n penuh lantai toilet... I call mr husband... Sama2 panik n we decide p hospital right away...

Masa tu mmg rasa redha ja... Mmg normal to gugur below 12weeks kan... Plus i didnt know at early srage cannot jalan too much... Weeks before mmg banyak tidur ja d rumah... Time mr husband cuti ja la mo jalan2...

Alhmadulillah, after scan, baby heart beat looks normal... Then doc ckp normal coz hormon not yet stable below 12weeks n kena mkn ubat till smpi 12weeks pregnant.

Mr husband also decide for me to move in with my family coz of the problem... I agree ja la demi keselamatan bersama...

My bleeding tidak la banyak sudah.. Just spotting until week11+. Alhamdulillah...

While in KL at parents place, teda buat apa la... Mkn n tidur ja. Even tidak kena bagi naik tangga...

At week16 i got spotting again.. Just few days before mr husband cuti for wedding sister-in-law, so tunggu dia balik la bagitau..... So buat mcm teda apa2 masalah... Spotting stop after 5-6days... Alhamdulillah, p scan all ok... Ask doc she said no problem...

My pregnancy goes well since then... Alhamdulillah...

Around week20, keputihan makin banyak... From online info, it may be sign of preterm labour... Bila tanya doc, they said its normal...

Even p specialist pun dia ckp normal. I want to show her the article i read pun dia x mau tengok... Huhuhu...

Week 22+ mr husband sudah d darat but got 1 week course d kemaman... So kononya mo teman la dia d rumah while dia d darat...

So i'm back in kemaman...

2nd day in kemaman, got a little bleeding... Gelabah again la... P klinik still kena ckp normal n maybe due to travelling from KL... Scan semua ok ja... But minta refer to specialist juga la...

On 4th day in kemaman p jumpa specialist yg rock n she said this is normal... No need to rest, just do normal things... Mmg sangat rock... Huhu. Bgus lgi klinik suruh banyak baring ja...

On 6th days d kemaman, tiba2 keluar seketul darah... Trus call kwn minta bawa p klinik LAGI... Smpi doc ckp "kamu ni asal balik kemaman, ada ja masalah... next time just stay in KL... Dont travel around like this anymore"...

But scan all ok ja..  Alhamdulillah...

7th day... After dinner, rasa cm ada yg keluar but ingatkan bleed lagi... (kebetulan mmg pkai pad sbb bleeding, so tidak la bocor d tgh jalan)...

Smpi rumah check, its not blood... Its water... Terus bergegas p hospital kemaman.

Sudahlah my buku merah tertinggal d KL, terpaksa la dgr bebelan doc n nurses... Pekakkan ja telinga...

Check up show im stable still as always... Cma air ketuban berkurang... Yg keluar 2 soak overnite pad. So they decide i stay warded dlm 2-3days to pantau.

Bole ja stay d rumah n p check hari2. Dkt ja pun hospital dgn rumah. But mr husband still on course n dia pakai kereta, i just stay d hosp ja la...

Jumaat whole day ok... No more water came out since afternoon till nite... But at 2am terasa susah mo tidur... Baring ja sakit perut... Bila duduk ok ja..

Then terasa mcm mo buang air besar... Tp x mo keluar...

Told nurse n ask for pelawas kasi buang air... She ask me to tahan n go to sleep n wait till doc visiting time later... Hurmmm...

After an hour makin sakit... I never knew kalau sakit kena minum air kasi reda (just knew few weeks back).. So baru diorang panggil doc pelatih... Yg bengong... Hahaha...

I ask again for pelawas... He said cannot, nnt terberanak.. So ok la...

He took sampel in my vagina... Tp xtau la apa resultnya... He said ok ja..

I cant baring so just sit with doc n nurses d kaunter... Berpeluh menahan sakit, dia bawa lagi carta smiley face to ask tahap kesakitan i have dr scale 1-5 n i said 3...

He said 3 is too much n macam mo suruh i said 2 or 1... Bodoh betul...

Then i p toilet... Mana tau mo keluar sudah bahan buangan..  Sbb sangat sakit mcm mo membuang. They ask for urine sample but teda hasil buangan yg mo keluar...

After 3 times balik2 p tandas n termenung d sana... I felt like ada kepala d bawah... Mo menangis pun teda air mata.. Terus bgtau doc n kena bawa to labour room. I didnt think of calling mr husband at that time sebab terlalu sakit kononnya... & memikirkan nasib c baby...

Sampai labour room... Push 2x, baby selamat keluar... X terasa sakit sbb my baby masih kecil... Just 0.49kg. Alhamdulillah, teda luka apa2 n teda stitch...

Masa mo keluarkan uri lebih sakit dr melahirkan anak for me... Then, kena seluk2 oleh doc to keluarkan darah yg membuak2 banyak...

I am aware chances of baby to survive is 50-50 in incubator coz her lungs is not fully terbentuk n function yet...
Tapi yang menyedihkan... D hospital kemaman teda incubator at that moment. Xtau la mmg teda or teda yg kosong... They didnt tell it to me pun... I heard masa diorang cakap between doc n nurses after delivery...

Siap dengar diorang cakap tidak sangka saya akan terberanak. Kalau tahu, they should have transfer me to hospital besar... Sakit hati gila bila dengar...

My baby sempat bernafas dlm 39min. But they didnt bring my baby to me while still bernafas... :(
I hold my baby only after she passed away...

After all that only nurse ask for mr husband phone no to call him... He arrived after a while n keep on saying sorry to me... 

Then, he bring my baby to me again.. Then only i cry all my heart out... Terasa kehilangan yang amat sangat... Mr husband pun menangis...:(

Hospital yg uruskan mandi n solat jenazah for baby... Mr husband sempat snap pict baby after dimandikan b4 kapan... Tapi 2snap ja.. Diorang mo cepat2 x tau kenapa...

Then mr husband bawa baby p kl utk dikebumikan dekat kuburan moyangnya... D kemaman tidak kenal org yg mo urus juga...

Mr husband said, he drive all d way while dukung anaknya... Alhamdulillah everything was fine...

Since then i cant stop crying when i'm alone... Nurse2 sana bagus jga la pujuk n give support... But that not that easy to accept juga la...

I stay d wad one more nite n discharge d next day... Uri baby diorang send to lab to check if there's any problem with d uri... Katanya akan dipost to me dlm sebulan... It's been nearly 2months... Ntah dimana uri anakku...

Next apoointment will be on 1104 nie... To know result dr vagina sampel taken before and apa apa lagi yang patut...

When check up in hospital putrajaya, the nurse tell me that baby 22weeks can survive and malaysia already have the tech... But mmg bukan rezeki my baby... Coz im in kemaman at that time... Not in putraaya~

This coming 12th April... Genap 2bulan pemergian my little angel... Nur Adilah Husna ( cahaya keadilan kebaikan).

Mummy sure baby is happier 'there' disisi Allah...

Semoga Allah kurniakan kami adik utk Adilah... Insya Allah.. :)